Grief: Top 10 Best and Worst Things to Say to Someone Grieving, Says Grief Expert Aurora Winter

LOS ANGELES, Jan. 14, 2011 /PRNewswire/ -- In the wake of the shootings in Arizona, our nation is struggling with grief - and struggling with what to say to someone who is grieving.

"People are very uncomfortable when they try to comfort someone who is grieving. If you say the wrong thing, you can actually make matters worse," said Aurora Winter, Founder of the Grief Coach Academy, and author of "From Heartbreak to Happiness."

Here are some tips on what to say at a funeral or wake to comfort people in bereavement:

Do say:

• You're not alone - I'm here.
• I can't imagine how painful this must be for you.
• My heart goes out to you.
• What specifically can I do to support you?
• Grief is a normal and natural reaction to loss.

Don't say:

• Don't feel bad.
• Be grateful you had her so long.
• At least you have other children.
• You're young. You can get another husband/wife/child.
• It just takes time.

"Time alone does not heal," says Winter, who founded the Grief Coach Academy after the death of her husband. She is passionate about helping grieving people. "The right actions heal. Get support and talk to someone, such as a certified grief coach."

It is a relief to a grieving person to talk about their loss. Here are 3 steps to supporting someone who is in bereavement:

1. Acknowledge (their feelings and the situation)
2. Listen without fixing
3. Give hope and encouragement

If you are at a loss for words, there is nothing wrong with being authentic and simply stating, "I don't know what to say."

"Healing is a process, and there is a light at the end of the tunnel," says Aurora.

Aurora's book "From Heartbreak to Happiness" is her intimate diary of healing after her husband died suddenly at the age of 33, leaving her widowed with a 4-year-old son. "If I can go from heartbreak to happiness, you can, too," says Aurora.

As a resource to comfort grieving people, "From Heartbreak to Happiness" is available as a complimentary ebook at http://www.FromHeartbreakToHappiness.com. To learn more about how to help grieving people, you can get a free CD online at http://www.GriefCoachAcademy.com.  

About Aurora Winter

Formerly a film and TV executive producer, Aurora Winter has over a decade of experience with the media. Aurora is the founder of the Grief Coach Academy, which is dedicated to training coaches how to coach their clients through grief, and From Heartbreak to Happiness®.

She's a popular guest on radio, TV and print, and has reached over a million people with her message of hope, healing, and happiness. She's a sought-after workshop leader, coach trainer, speaker, and author.

Dr. Wayne Dyer endorsed Aurora's book, "From Heartbreak To Happiness." "I read every page of this beautiful diary -- it touched my heart and I'm sure it will impact yours."

Aurora co-stars with best-selling authors including Bernie Siegel (author of "Love, Medicine, and Miracles") and others in the award-winning documentary feature film "What If."

SOURCE Aurora Winter